you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
And apparently I was the one that started the drunken make out session that broke the window
I went to McDonald's this morning still half drunk with penises drawn all over my body, when my card was declined the cashier asked if I needed Jesus
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize
