at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
I think shooting the BMW with the bow and arrow is when our group became the evening's antagonist
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
St. Patrick's day can kiss my ass. Still hungover. I guess I showed up at my gym blacked out yesterday morning. Like im not missing a gym day b
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize