Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
I just found 20 dollars in my vibrator box. Was it a drunken sign to myself to get more?
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed...
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
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