I cant help but queef when the male extremity enters
What is a male extremity?
i didnt realize it was that long since you've had sex
It was confusing and full of hummus
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
You wouldn't know anything about the tooth on ice in my freezer would you?
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
He just peed in the cab. I repeat..IN.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
Randomize
