Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
He ate me out while Space Jam was on. My life is complete.
She took a six hour road trip with me so I could have revenge sex with my ex's brother. That is the definition of a best friend.
Also, don't forget your plan to die young at a shrooms-fueled orgy.
I just had sex with a man wearing a Darth Vader helmet....he pressed the voice button the whole time that said "I am your father". I don't think I can ever come back from this
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Randomize
