Betty ford says i'm here all night
Me liking this guy is the best diet ever. Do I want this cookie...or do I want to get laid.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
Hey. Did I get punched in the face last night?
Yeah. I told you I would and you didn't believe me.
Randomize
