Just mADE A PArabola og urine
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Green mimosas i think yes
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
You kept asking the bartender if you could "buy a dollar".
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
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