Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
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She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
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I feel like we have both made good decisions regarding our vaginas lately
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
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