she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
I have to charm this cab driver. Hold on.
Randomize
