All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't care how ugly she is, I can't turn down a free movie +bj. In this economy that's downright irresponsible
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize