There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
I'm home now. bring me food and boobies
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
wearing the bible to the ABC party, thought you'd appreciate that.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
