someone get that fucking seahorse.
well I can't set my house on fire every night
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I deserve this hangover.
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