...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
There is nothing more demoralizing than exchanging 150 dollar Christmas gifts with a girl your not sleeping with
Hey, this is a mass text. I have a hospital bill from November, and I don't know from what. Did anyone bring me to the hospital on a drunken night that I don't remember...?
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize
