I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I was really hoping my 420 would involve a lot more weed and a lot less buttholes
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Election Day 2016 shall forever live in infamy as the day when I hobbled through my neighborhood, mascara melting down my face, wearing one slipper and a cast, blood and cum all over my skirt, carrying a box of wine, and no one even noticed.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
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