we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
I don't remember anything from last night, but at track I found my thong next to the high jump pit... So it must has been decent
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
Randomize