i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I don't care if I just threw up. You kiss me now. This is marriage.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
Randomize
