I drowning out her crying with songs from the Beatles it's good for us both. She relives her 30s and i dont have to hear her cry
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I just hooked up with the same bartender my dad cheated on my mom with in the 90s. Not sure how this makes me feel.
family traditions my good sir
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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