Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
Still waiting. He said he'd call between 2 and 10... apparently he's like the Comcast of drug dealers.
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Proof That Kendall Jenner Is The Queen of Cannes
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
You think posting ushers "let it burn" video on his fb page is in bad taste? haha
The 21 Worst Ways People Have Been Dumped
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Fuck me this girl I went home with has a cover on her remote control so there is no spills to ruin it. Imagine how many condoms she's going to make me wear
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
If more people understood that brunch is at 3pm the world would be a better place because you don't have to wake up early. Breakfast food is important