the new term for farting is butt boxing.
everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
i'm starting to get pissed at how pandora is trying to force coldplay on me
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
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