Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
I will one day have loud vengeance sex as my revenge against you. Until then I'm just going to sit in the living room playing John Mayer while you're trying to do it.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
Hypothetically, if a stripper with braces bites you on the cleavage and it leaves an open wound, do you need a tetanus shot?
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Don't be surprised if I hand out mini dildos on Halloween
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
