She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
handjob tips. give me some.
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
Let us do this. Tomorrow night is thirsty Thursday. Let us drink whiskey from the bottle and have men in plastic gloves inscribe permanent images of each others faces onto our buttocks.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Randomize
