The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
im marching my happy ass in there and im not leaving until he cheats on his girlfriend!
It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Great parenting moment: noticing your kid is going to puke from gorging fish sticks and sending her outside. Then watching her puke on your dog.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I'm like 87% sure some random guy starting biting my ear after grinding me for like 30 seconds... I feel suprisingly unconcerned
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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