girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
