That girl's pussy is like White Castles, you crave it once in awhile, but you know next morning you regret eating it.
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
I tried to take a photo for proof but couldn't hold my penis, camera, and measuring tape all at the same time.
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
