We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Two big black bouncers picked you up and escorted you to the elevator.
I didn't even do anything wrong. For all they knew I could have been on the US Olympic Gymnastic team. Would they kick Gabby Douglas out of a bar? I don't think so.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
Hey so I got my period
Thank god I wasn't ready to deal with sober you for 9 months
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize
