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• (847): View more from Illinois

  is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?

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• (903): View more from Texas

  ....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."

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• (415): View more from California

  The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.

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• (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?

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  23 Disturbing Small-Town Horror Stories

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• (303): View more from Colorado

  that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  my facebook is like a giant collection of my one night stands

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• (818): View more from California

  His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.

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• (510): View more from California

  It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.

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• (845): View more from New York

  Just realized how sopa could affect my ability to watch porn, son of a bitch

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  These 23 Kids Have The Most Overbearing Parents Imaginable

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  Getting stoned at work has never been a good idea, but im always more than willing to give it another chance

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?

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• (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick

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• (270): View more from Kentucky

  So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.

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• (514): View more from Quebec

  So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..

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