My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
Just seen a scantily clad pirate with 2 36 packs of natty ice on a bike riding with no hands. If she doesn't hit a speed bump she's golden and should be on the next Americas got talent.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
Please stop leaving drunk voicemails with your new black/Irish accent.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
IF I CANT STRIP TO SANTA BABY THEN WHY EVEN HAVE CHRISTMAS.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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