I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
he said didn't have much sexual experience and then proceeded to tell me he is going to make me cum harder than my vibrator could
well, that escalated quicky
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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