Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
Don't talk to me about lonely until you're eating marshmallows for dinner in your underwear watching House of Cards for 12 hours straight. I hate all you couples
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize