Texts From Last Night

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  (440): View more from Ohio

  my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?

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  (440): my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that? http://tfl.nu/nj0k
  Replies (31) Good night (5647) Bad night (596)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs

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  (847): it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs http://tfl.nu/alw1
  Replies (14) Good night (3940) Bad night (800)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.

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  (770): It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college. http://tfl.nu/l73u
  Replies (15) Good night (5805) Bad night (818)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.

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  (717): yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup. http://tfl.nu/otef
  Replies (13) Good night (4430) Bad night (1530)
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  (705): View more from Ontario

  her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken

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  (705): her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken http://tfl.nu/6ixh
  Replies (13) Good night (1025) Bad night (3886)
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  (224): View more from Illinois

  Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.

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  (224): Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little. http://tfl.nu/kc37
  Replies (16) Good night (1877) Bad night (2810)
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  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.

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  (864): I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened. http://tfl.nu/5edl
  Replies (4) Good night (2680) Bad night (1226)
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her

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  (201): i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her http://tfl.nu/006u
  Replies (5) Good night (1337) Bad night (712)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.

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  (801): Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches. http://tfl.nu/nznf
  Replies (3) Good night (681) Bad night (1920)
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS

  (443): View more from Maryland

  I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.

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  (609): YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS (443): I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO. http://tfl.nu/tc5m
  Replies (16) Good night (3317) Bad night (667)
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  (770): View more from Georgia

  Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.

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  (770): Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever. http://tfl.nu/1wjc
  Replies (6) Good night (1966) Bad night (650)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  I asked her politely not to touch my dick

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  (703): I asked her politely not to touch my dick http://tfl.nu/5dz2
  Replies (6) Good night (734) Bad night (1536)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?

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  (717): You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING? http://tfl.nu/nnf3
  Replies (3) Good night (819) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (719): View more from Colorado

  What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"

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  (719): What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family" http://tfl.nu/mzlk
  Replies (1) Good night (512) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (828): View more from North Carolina

  I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch

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  (828): I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch http://tfl.nu/l90t
  Replies (1) Good night (415) Bad night (184)

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