So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
i'm pretty sure i just ruined some dude's romantic riverside sunset proposal by running outside and puking in a bush.
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
you closed your eyes and pointed to a cupboard..there was vodka on the top shelf. your sixth sense is amazing. plus, we convinced the foreign kid you're a booze whisperer
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year