It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Fuck your 100 proof Hot Damn. Do you know what 100 proof vomit tastes like? Anger.
would you say our friendship is at the "help each other shave animal patterns in each other's pubes" phase?
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
Yeah I'd rather get obliterated at home.
Same here. I'd like to ensure that I won't get pissed on.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
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