Texts From Last Night

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  (714): View more from California

  he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday

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  (714): he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday http://tfl.nu/odld
  Replies (18) Good night (534) Bad night (6277)
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  (949): View more from California

  dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt

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  (949): dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt http://tfl.nu/6eac
  Replies (42) Good night (820) Bad night (6488)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.

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  (850): Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober. http://tfl.nu/1ay2
  Replies (44) Good night (3501) Bad night (822)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub

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  (503): you laugh because clearly you have never had to clean poop out of a tub http://tfl.nu/rmdg
  Replies (10) Good night (683) Bad night (5735)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.

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  (623): everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls. http://tfl.nu/6oxa
  Replies (37) Good night (5463) Bad night (1362)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS

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  (647): I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS http://tfl.nu/1k5d
  Replies (35) Good night (8175) Bad night (1093)
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  (916): View more from California

  Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?

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  (916): Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents? http://tfl.nu/8kv6
  Replies (20) Good night (2461) Bad night (1286)
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  (870): View more from Arkansas

  he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs"

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  (870): he texted me at 3am asking for "one of my famous blowjobs" http://tfl.nu/uf2c
  Replies (9) Good night (2499) Bad night (713)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.

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  (503): I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too. http://tfl.nu/alyx
  Replies (5) Good night (2266) Bad night (537)
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  (740): View more from Ohio

  Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked.

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  (740): Yeah. Let's save our goodbyes for when I'm obnoxiously and embarrassingly drunk and more than likely naked. http://tfl.nu/voiu
  Replies (3) Good night (1090) Bad night (429)
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  (912): View more from Georgia

  Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say

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  (912): Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say http://tfl.nu/bgnm
  Replies (2) Good night (922) Bad night (290)
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  (303): View more from Colorado

  They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.

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  (303): They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar. http://tfl.nu/u9wl
  Replies (2) Good night (277) Bad night (668)
• Favorite

  (269): View more from Michigan

  That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.

  (269): View more from Michigan

  AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.

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  (269): That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE. (269): AND SOME IN THE TRUNK. http://tfl.nu/jicm
  Replies (4) Good night (941) Bad night (234)
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.

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  (207): Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out. http://tfl.nu/biah
  Replies (5) Good night (437) Bad night (258)
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  (832): View more from Houston, Texas

  Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."

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  (832): Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen." http://tfl.nu/e369
  Replies (1) Good night (417) Bad night (185)

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