You're earring is so big in my mouth
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
Ok so you know that's gonna be legally viewed as kidnapping, right?
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
How do you clean puke off a stuffed bear?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
