Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
I'd like to be surprised that there's a picture of someone pouring champagne in my boobs on Instagram, but I can't.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
He's not very smart so he didn't know I was yelling at him with monologues from Scandal.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
The coke machine at work is laughing at me. Literally. I just heard laughter from the coke machine
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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