She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
my mom just called and warned me someone is trying to serve me, i feel like i'm playing an extreme game of hide and go seek these next weeks
Seriously. There are at least 10 other people drinking at the bar with me at 10:40. Im justifying it with the fact that I've been up since 5am.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
nobody was home so I boiled the dildo
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
