what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
I'm pretty sure I just won at life. I touched the bushy tail of a squirrel while he had his mouth full and was digging in a plant on campus. That is all.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
Well drunk me was looking out for sober me again, hid the beer and bought another case for me
Bro, that'd be the third dick I've taken down in the office.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Punched myself in the face trying to open a bottle of Vicodin one handed. Night is going well.
Randomize
