That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
i just made a "things you cannot forget to do this week just because you're high" list.
he pretended not to hear me say our safety word. how do you think I feel?
it's sunday funday. and also, who can outslut the other day.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
Randomize
