Shiiiit I think I'm getting sick. probably had something to do with the fact that i shared my mouth with everyone last night.
Wait. That came out far sluttier than I intended.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
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A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
I'm doing running of the bulls tomorrow at 7am...except in New Orleans roller derby girls chase you.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
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WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
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