$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Just so you know, each of my boobs fits perfectly in a martini glass.
nutella sex= disaster
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Am I really that girl who walks around half naked wearing a cowboy hat begging for liquor at some random guys house
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
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