The worse part is i sent a text at like three that said i was getting head... Now i have no idea who's mouth has been on my dick
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
Being the only woman in a triathlon group - it's a penis paradise.
There are so many things that would come back to haunt me if I ran for President someday.
like that video of you mad stoned vomiting in the bdubs parking lot after going to a pizza buffet screaming how you needed to make room for froyo
Wat
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
The sex is great, I just think it'd be better if we listened to Deftones during it.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
