No, we're smoking outside. We're hot boxing the world.
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
A kid wearing a Batman belt buckle in my psych class just asked how people get pee fetishes. I'm too high for this.
I just got a new temperpedic mattress pad and started smoking weed again in the same week. finding motivation to go to a 9:AM class is close to impossible.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
You'd think it'd be fun living next door to a guy whose neck you once licked. Surprise, it's not.
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize
