I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
life lesson# 3: saying thank you on a subway really means "im not a native new yorker, so please feel free to touch my ass"
hmm. interesting. explain how you came across this knowledge.
i sneezed. he said bless you. i said thank you. he groped. i again said thank you.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
The best part is when you puked in your slurpree and the 7 eleven guy still made you pay for it
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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