Trying to find something to do here is like trying to find a vegan resturant in alabama.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
That's terrible. At least give it a creative name like muff mobile.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
New low, passed out while taking a shit for an hour with my parents home, suprised they didnt notice
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
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