You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
clearly I should have checked to see if he was an NRA member before I went back to his house and woke up in Heston's haven.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
Highlight of the day: realizing the man in the car next to mine was getting road head... at 2:45pm... nicely done sir, nicely done.
I really hope you aren't where I think you are. Dude she has a MUSTACHE. You need Jesus..
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
There is no sno cone on earth better than alone naked time. Side note: text when you all are headed home.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
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