you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
It was annoying to wait 4 hour for him to be inside for 5 seconds.
Just realized after we're done pre-gaming for St. Patricks Day, we have March Madness, the first day of spring, and Easter to pre-game for. March is a great month.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
Yeaaah. I'm kinda wary about that guy. Does he still have that taser that he found on the train?
I just spent 10 min explaining to my mom how orange is a strange color. I think she knows
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
Last time I was your wingman I had to deal with a girl whose only interest in my body was to clip my toenails. I'm not interested.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
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