You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I told him he was, quote: "A big cuddly bear" and he needed to get into my bed or I would set his Golden Retriever free.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
I am making it a rule that only people I am comfortable around enough to not have to put a bra on are allowed for Sunday funday. I think that's a good rule for someone who started drinking alone at noon while everyone else here sipped their coffee.
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
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