SEEEEXXX PLEASE
No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
He' s half Black and half Italian, I finally asked...this penis maybe one for the records.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
Russian roulette. Between salvia and weed. You in?
FUCK YOU MAN
Bring gay.
By that I meant the rum. I just realized that my request made no sense. You always bring gay.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
