her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
She's comparing the feel of breasts to shredded cabbage. Weirdest. Grandmother. Ever.
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I guess "hi, I know your mom, she taught me in high school" is an effective pickup line
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Randomize
