(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Shit sorry. Maybe I wont give you this sweet ass fanny pack I found in my parents attic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into his living room and saw him watching the play-offs while eating tomato paste out of the can with a bottle of wine. I'm telling you to stop talking to him. now.
I can't believe I paid your booty call for a ride home in cake.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
You offered him a “Sorry I Blew Your Brother” Blowjob. How does that make it right?
I promised him it would be better than the one I gave his brother which is really nice of me since their actually only half brothers and his brother is cuter
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