I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Harry Potter pub crawl tonight. You know you're living your life right when your check list for the evening is wizard robes, wand and acid.
its like i just tried to scrub the hangover off of me.
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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