OMG. Drunk.
I'm so glad you fill me in on these things.
Sorry. Must've been trying to twitter.
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I checked for jungle juice on Weight Watchers. they didn't have it.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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