D3 body, D1 cock
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I apologize in advance for attempting to drunkenly hookup with your sister
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Is it sad that I have better conversations with his roommate before or after sex than I do with him in general?
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
He wouldn't shut up so I started sending him pictures of animal dicks
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