tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize
