But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
we have pet lesbian snakes
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Buying drug test kits off amazon. And qualifying for amazonSmile donation to a kids hospital feels wrong and funny at the same time xD
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
I mean his penis was perfect in pictures but its even more perfect inside me
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